Aroon and the others

The past few days have been so….I’m not even sure.
My dog got into a nest of three baby bunnies. Seven days old probably, eyes not even open. We rescued them. One of them was a runt, was in shock, and dehydrated. I nursed him back to health, but he was still in shock. There was nothing to do about it but to put them back in the nest, that’s what we were told to do by the wild life rescue people. We tried to put protective stuff around the nest…but my dog got back in. It’s not his fault, it’s his nature you know? But he got back in. He had the runt in his mouth…I held the little thing. By this time I had named him “aroon”. It’s Gaelic for “little dear” (I think). Aroon had a heart attack, and died in my hand. He was so small he fit in the palm of my hand. I watched him die, and it hurt because I couldn’t do anything, not even ease it’s pain. We buried him in the yard. We put more protective stuff around the nest…. but my dog got in…again. Well we’re not sure if he got in. He was just standing over one of the bunnies. They’re mobile now. My dad picked up the bunny, and brought it to me. It was hurt in one eye. I held it until it calmed down; I stopped the bleeding while my dad was calling every place we could find. Everywhere was closed today. I feed the bunny formula and my dad comes and puts the other bunny in the little box we made up. I noticed something was wrong with him. It broke my heart and I cried when I found out what was wrong. His little…body was broken…from the waist down. It was deformed, and twisted. I cried so hard. I’m crying now. There was nothing to do, I couldn’t ease the baby’s pain. I couldn’t help it. It wasn’t going to live, even if it does it won’t survive. It’s bleeding internally; blood is coming from his mouth. I know, it’s just an animal. But it didn’t seem fair. NOT FAIR at all. Not even a full week into the world, and all of this happened. I wasn’t mad at my dog; he was just doing what he’s bred to do. I wasn’t really mad…. I was just thoroughly depressed. They were so tiny, so helpless…they could barely walk. They couldn’t feed themselves, they were so scared. Yes…we had to put them back in the nest. The one that has a broken body we put back because…. since there was no where open to help it or put it down…we thought his last hours should be with his mama. It just, hurt so much to do it. That there was absolutely nothing I could do…the other bunny we’re going to take to the vet tomorrow to see if its eye can be saved. The sick bunny…if he survives the night…. we’re going to take it to the vet…to do the only thing that could stop the pain. It just doesn’t seem fair. What makes it worse…is that these are only bunnies. It breaks my heart more to think that…there are children out there like that. Tossed into the darkness, so young…hurt, broken, sick, hungry…. I can’t stand it. My heart feels like it’s going to burst, it hurts so. I don’t know why this is affecting me so bad….I’ve looked at dead bodies before, I’ve seen sick people, I’ve seen lots of things….but I don’t know. It just…hit me bad.